Mood: Optimistic
Behind the door a brilliant pulsing light
I knew what it was, what it meant
I knew at my core
what lie behind the door
A power unbearably strong
I became deathly afraid
but irresistably drawn
I wanted to bask in it forever
I wanted to paint it, sing it, speak it, to be it
But I would keep on protecting myself
cleverly, I thought
from ever confronting or claiming
the full creative blast of that Force
Surrender to it
Let it in, let it out
(a loving voice said)
Get out of your own way
It’s okay to be afraid.
I took the loving voice aside
And told it all the reasons
How it couldn’t be that simple
And Life couldn’t be that kind
The doorway dimmed
And the light began to recede
I knew what this meant, what I’d done
And I became truly, deathly afraid
I pleaded for the light to return
I fell to my knees, humble, a child
Surrender to it
Let it in, let it out
(the loving voice said)
Get out of your own way
It’s alright if you’re afraid.
And the floods came
And the sorrow was great
But the relief was greater that followed
As the cracks began to brighten
And the fear returned, but lessened
My body lost its tension
The pulse grew stronger
The brilliance grew fuller
The darkness crawled to the edges
Of wherever I’d been hiding
And I fell silent
Surrender to it
Let it in, let it out
(my loving voice said)
Get out of your own way
You don’t need to be afraid.
I nodded my head
The door burst open
The light almost visibly smiling
All it ever wanted, I guess
Was for me to say yes
I was still afraid
But I didn’t go blind
I didn’t get burned
And the fear lessened,
With a simple intention
Whispered in a loving voice
I was being warmed from the inside
Only my suffering would die.
comments
3 Responses to “Mood: Optimistic”
Leave A Comment
Woohoo, first sneak peek! I’m proud of ya!
…. and only my suffering would die ….
Your own self awareness and ability to articulate it, has alway amazed me….Wow! What a great poem!